The Litigator

Counsel Dana W.

J.D., Order of the Coif · Yale Law

Res ipsa loquitur, the thing speaks for itself, and it speaks in dicta. Worn whilst prevailing on appeal, this garment arrives with a notarised Certificate of Authenticity, for counsel objects, on principle, to hearsay. Any prior brief is hereby overruled.

Jacques-Louis David, The Death of Socrates (1787)

David made of one composed mind facing judgment a moral spectacle; she simply wins, then files for costs.

Field

Appellate Litigation

Worn

13 hours, worn during closing arguments

Notes

Persuasive beyond reasonable doubtOld leatherThe tang of victory

Customise your acquisition

Extra days of wear (+$25/day)

None +3 days (+$75) +5 days (+$125) +8 days (+$200)

Wedgie wear

No wedgie Wedgie wear ;) (+$25)

Connoisseur add-ons

A handwritten “lecture note”, in the scholar's own hand (+$50) A photo set, five discreet provenance images (+$75) Scent customisation, to your written brief (+$30) Rush processing, dispatched within 24 hours (+$40)

Add to Bag, $249

• Signed, numbered Certificate of Authenticity
• Discreet, unmarked, vacuum-sealed packaging
• Seller credential independently verified
• 18+ only, sold as a novelty collectible